This is it. This is where it all starts
I’m sitting at my desk in my new home, with a cup of tea, and a laptop in front of me.
This is a big change, as I usually find myself with a notebook and a pen. This is where everything changes. I’ve endured so much growth that I now struggle to express who I am, or rather: who I have become.
I started keeping a daily journal back in October 2003. I was 16. I never felt like I had anyone to truly listen to me until I got a counsellor. He suggested I start keeping a journal. So I started with one that had little pictures in the corner of the page, this made it easier to write every day because if I didn’t know what to write then I could use the picture as inspiration. By the end of the first journal I had developed a structure. I wrote about what I did every day.
This daily reflection allowed me to take time to connect with myself, and to get the day out of my system so I never had to worry about forgetting something. When I had something big happen I would take a regular piece of paper to write it all out and then fold it up and put it in my journal. This was the extent of me writing out my emotions. It wasn’t very often that I took the time to connect to my emotions in the beginning.
This daily practice allowed me to see the patterns in my life. To see the lessons learned from certain events. To see the same lesson arise from another convoluted event and realizing there was something I missed the first time. Or the realization that I just wasn’t ready to fully learn that lesson the first time and I am a glutton for punishment until that lesson is fully learned. My daily journal has been my longest commitment in life. No matter what happens, I have my journal to write in. It also keeps me motivated to do exciting things with my life, so that I have something interesting to write about.
In 2016 I was newly single. Living on my own again. My daily journal wasn’t enough. I was learning how to sit with my emotions. So I started my freewriting journal. No structure. Just raw writing, the odd score of rummy 500 between friends, and notes about what I’m currently learning. This was my liberation. I found a way to dive deeper into myself. Any time I found myself struggling to navigate my emotions, or there was something overwhelming in my life, I would sit down the write it all out. Through this practice I found a way to sit with my emotions. I found a way to connect with my inner child. I found a way to navigate the biggest challenges in my life by tapping into my own intuitive guidance.
I have been working on myself for over 2 decades, I’ve come a long way. I guess this is what I want to share with you. My journey. Like I said in the beginning, So much change! Now I’ve started school to become a professional counsellor, because not only has counselling helped me navigate this rollercoaster called life, but I just love understanding the human psyche. I love problem solving and I love shining a light on other people’s paths.
So, My hope in sharing my writing with you, is that you’ll be able to see how I navigate this life. Learning to be fully present through the ups and downs, and genuinely enjoying the highs without dreading the inevitable lows. Learning and growing from each experience along the way. So if you want a companion on this adventure called life, I’m right here, you’re welcome to join me.